only in dreams

The moment i felt , i am closer to shore.................some one shook me so hard that i realised , i was dreaming ...the moment i felt , its time to breathe ...i felt so choked , that i realised i was dreaming!!

Virgin my heart like a sea bed.....that hasn't seen the sun light till now, scattered like sand, went flying around the ocean...... that i was trying to sail through , while i was dreaming !!

My aroma my heart , is nectar of love.....that you will never find , if you try to be mean to me .....and will be deprived of my love that can not be seen, but can be felt only in dreams !!

 I sprang forth from an oyster ...... from the bottom of sea , Aphrodite like i feel, trapped in my body ...that needs nothing but love....and ever if i am able to receive , in this life you will see....i am the one ,who you find only in dreams !!

copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit photobucket.com

2nd versatile blogger award

 
this is my fourth blogger award given to me by Akshay Kumar G :)let me tell you a bit about his blog first his blogs are versatile and he has the talent and ability to write over anything and everything in the most beautiful way:)you can go through his blog here The Eternal Fighter, The Ultimate Comeback Kid!.Thank you sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much Akshay for this award:)

The rule of accepting the award are as follows

1.Paste the award picture on your blog
2.Thank the person who gave you the award
3.Pass on the award to 15fellow bloggers
4.share 7random facts about yourself

Well quite honestly i dont think i am in a position to review and award anyones blog as am new aroun here myself  and am 8months away from my blogoversary,morover i would like to give 62awards as all those following my blog and all those whos blogs i am following are really award worthy blogs..so its very difficult for me to decide.So in a random order i am giving the award,i am sorry if i missed giving someone the award but i promise i will do so the next time i recieve an award:)

Heres the list of awardees-

VST for Scribblings On The Walls Of Silence
Christy for My Kitchen Flavors - Bon Appetit!
elvira lobo for its my life
andy for Thoughts Of Beauty In The Stillness Of Dawn...
princess fiona for The Princess Passions
sangeeta reghu nair for Sangry Words
amit ganguly for Sustainable Sphere
sawan for Blogger (Blogspot) - ruffledsoul
kalpana misra for A rolling stone gathers no moss
sheril for TravelNlife
vijay shenoy for Minds Eye Of Life
magic eye for Pets forever
prime aque for  SB - Your decisions can best portray your life...
tim for Higher Truths
readit for Readitt 

Now 7random things about me are-
1.am  BAD BAD BAD BAD BAD cook
2.am as lazy as one can get
3.i am a die hard secularist
4.i can never watch movies on television have the attention span of a ninny
5.am a fitness freak
6.a major time animal lover
7.my dream is when i tyrn old i should have a big farm with hundreds of stray dogs:)

now time to inform all the awardees so ciao:)

blogger award liebster

                                                    
This is my second and third blogger award and am truly honoured as its been given to me by Andy whos poetry i admire so much and often wonder what his inspiration for writing is. You can read his blog here Thoughts Of Beauty In The Stillness Of Dawn...  once again Andy a biiiigggggggggg thank you:) and also by elvira lobo whos talent for describing a picture with poetry or just simple poetry is beyond words you can read her blog here its my life thank you sooooooooooooo much elvira once again.
I am combining the two liebster blog awards i have recieved individually from andy and elvira:)hence the dual award logo:)
The rules of accepting the award are as follows
1.link back to the person who gave you the award
2.pick 5people you want to share the award with and notify them on their blogs
3.post the award on your blog and spread the love

Well quite honestly i dont think i am in a position to review and award anyones blog as am new aroun here myself  and am 8months away from my blogoversary,morover i would like to give 62awards as all those following my blog and all those whos blogs i am following are really award worthy blogs..so its very difficult for me to decide.So in a random order i am giving the award,i am sorry if i missed giving someone the award but i promise i will do so the next time i recieve an award:)

heres the list of the awardees

 nuktaa for To think or Not to...
beyond for SOLILOQUIES - Beyond Few Words
thousif raza for *
r phoenix for The rPhoenix's altar...!
leo paw for bigbitz
bikramjit for Me and My Random Thoughts
sujatha sathya for Conversations
akshay kumar g for The Eternal Fighter, The Ultimate Comeback Kid!
raj for A beautiful mind!!
ajay aggarwal for FREEZED MOMENTS

now i need to inform everyone..so bye:)
p.s. i have tried not to award to all the fellow bloggers who i have previously my apologies for that its just because i wanted to pass on the award to everyone equally:)

i seek some advice

I heard some one knock at my heart .... before i could open the door ...i placed my face on the wall and heard my heart throb that was now hard....... and it seemed some one was trying to read my thoughts , buried deep in my heart.

I told my heart " hold on and make no sound , while he reads all my thoughts .....and wait for him to leave and come back to uncover my heart " that was not revealed for some reason  deep in my heart.

He came back to re read my unrevealed heart.... and said "now don't fear my love, if you understand the way i am made ,i am here to stay for rest of the life "

I opened the door ,that remained closed for long ....he broke open the wall ....... that concealed my slain heart...... and  entered , holding a memoir in his hand.....that i read through the night..... while he lay by my side....the story of his life.

I left for the day with peace in my mind.....woke up last night ,disturbed with noise.....confusion still prevails with  last words .....they haunt my mind.

Do i need to go through the trial once again....why cant i live with empty my life....haven't i had enough of this life,....tired i look at myself in  the mirror that says " you are too precious to let one play games with your heart....its too late to go through another trial  "

Uncertain i seek some advice !!

copyright (c)alkanarula
photo credit comic vine

i tried so hard

I tried so hard not to express how i felt when i dedicate my songs ......my songs  that i wrote when you were away and were gone .....frenzied my heart , not a trace on my face of anxious my heart .

I tried so hard to read out aloud , the songs that i wrote but before i could dedicate my songs to you....i heard a whistle of fast approaching storm.....a storm that wiped away my smile that i hide behind my eyes.

An alarm that blew my heart in small  flakes .....the flakes that went  flying around with your smile ...the smile on your face that i saw , had an essence that i knew, was not mine.

You broke my heart,you tore me apart....you were gone to stay away, with some one in your heart....all this while i wrote all my songs for the day, when we meet again and dedicate them to you .

The strange game that life played , i froze like ice felt my body being pierced with spikes.....when i saw the shade behind you had a colour that wasn't mine.

I gathered all flakes and left from there with a smile on my face.....i left no trace for you to erase the pain that i felt in frenzied my heart that was now recovering from the shock, that you are now gone .


copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit oenskin.com

Paulo Coelho

It seemed i have come through the storm ..... the life seemed to have become a little kind....when i met somebody  who proved me wrong....few days i couldnt write.......the pain grew in my mind.....fate didnt seem on my side........ i feel i should leave it for a while......and wait for right moment to arrive.....and let the life take a call .....  at times i behave like a fool though i dont get carried away but  forget that life plays with my heart  .....it allows me to fly a bit but my wings are tied to some hidden tool.......every sound of thud opens my eyes....why am i trying to fly and not satiated with this life....but the desire of being loved is so strong,i am left with no choice.....the hunt for somebody does not stop though i know i am not entitled to have someone in this life..... i come back and read what Paulo Coelho says in Alchemist "when you want something really bad the entire universe aligns itself and works towards giving it to you " and wonder if that is really true and is right.

copyright(c)alka narula
photo credit layoutsparks.com

i know it now

      This is a thanks giving post to all my blogger friends for their contribution and feedback to my  1st attempt to compse lyrics Keeping in mind the feed back i recieved this is my 2nd attempt to compose lyrics..                                          
                                                    
all life i searched for you but didn't know...... that you live in my heart............................but i know it now ;
all life i thought you are a mystery... that i cannot solve....... but you were hiding in my heart..but i know it now ;
all around i looked for you but didn't know....that you live inside me..............................but i know it now ;

you are no more a mystery, ever since i got to know...where to look for you...........that you live in my heart ;
no more i wonder about aura i see,ever since i got to know..where it comes from..that surrounds my heart ;
what made you think,that you could hide from me.....i will keep looking for you around me and not search my heart;

my love you are in my every dream,i smell you in my breath when i breathe......you cant hide from me.....u should know it now ;
my love i hear you speak with my soul when i sleep.....don't you think ,i cant hear your heart beat.....u should
know it now ;
now i know why my hear beats louder than it should beat...there are two hearts together rhyming love that they feel.....u should know it now ;
you were a mystery...that i solved ,when i searched my heart to look for you and i know it now.....that you live in my heart.

copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit photobucket.com

MS( dedicated to people suffering from multiple sclerosis)

  This piece of poetry is dedicate to those who are suffering from MS(multiple sclerosis) and inspired by the conversation i had with my daughter,  when i suffered the same  but had a miraculous recovery .

i try to run ,i try to escape but deep in my heart i know i have to live for the life i nurtured throughout and didn't hesitate .....i think of the day when i was almost slain , i opened my eyes when i heard my name ; i was  moved when i saw tears spill all over her face and she cried ," how am i going to live without you , i cant live without you."
i think of the day when emotions were  strong ,  hard to believe that i was moments away from the storm  that could have swept me away  ,and taken me along but her tears played a miraculous game ....i rose  and fought  ..... took her in my arms when she said " how am i going to live without you , i cant live without you"
All this while i never thought about my  life , but the trauma i faced changed my view point about life,she is the one who is closest to my heart, she is the one who inspires me to write ...i look at  rose like her face , when she smiles with  a twinkle in her eyes.... i take her in my arms and rhyme these lines ," i am here for years to come , i will be beside you"
copyright (c)alka arula
photo credit child/fetal development

aura

it was trying to chew a plum with striking red its beak ...... before i could reach it dropped the seed near a stream.....and camouflaged among the leaves.

i  often lay near the tree searching for red beak....the twitter i couldn't hear since it camouflaged and disappeared....but fluttering sound i could hear ,the suspense i couldnt bear.

the night was" oh so sheer "..... i saw the red beak shimmer ,when the sun disappeared.....high tide was on its peak.....the flutter of wings became so clear.

i cried out "my love now dont disappear you are far yet so near " on this mesmerising night .....when the almighty is here.

i tore open my heart and sprinkled the love all over in the air.....the shimmering beak that had disappeared....picked up the pieces of my heart and reappeared.

some one i felt in my arms and the fragrance of plums i could breathe....all i could see was red aura that disappeared when morning sun reappeared.

i unfurled my empty arms , astonished my heart.....red shimmer i could see spread all over on me .....and the seed that fell in the stream lay next to me.

copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit cystallineambermoments.tumblr.com


.

lonely hearts

i wrote on empty walls....... i wrote about how i feel .....  my screams are loud and clear....  ...  hollow and deep in pain ......... my search is never ending it seems............ i see no one with me to share .....the end of saga , i believe could be the answer to this lonely heart ..... branding the life " too mean" might aggrivate the anger ,that life has for me....i think , i should accept the fate as i cant escape.....and i know , i have no control........... i am no one , but  part of a lonely tale...... a part of genesis i would rather say......so i must bow and not rebel....... and smile with the pain that has usurped the thump in my heart...... at times i wonder ,does every one feel the thirst,that i feel....though i am sure i am not  the only one......there has to be someone who is made for me...... and is in search of this lonely heart.....but the destiny has the pleasure to delay  till the day...... its convinced that, i cant live no more in pain.... withered my heart  pleads in greed to god , please hold both your hands together for me .....and watch all the tears i drop.......you might melt when you gather them and bestow your smile on me ....that would change the tears in to stars ....and make my heart smile that it stopped long time ago or else unfurl your arms and allow me to sleep .

copyright (c)alkanarula
photo credit photobucket.com

its my words

all i wanted was to wake up with some one by my side....some one to hold me,some one to stroke my hair.....before i opened my eyes.... some one who could share a pillow with me at night....some one to
share the laughter and the out burst when i cried.....life is lonely,without a soul by my side.....i wait for
tomorrow , the empty eyes look for some one to fill up hollow my heart...sound of  laughter, that i haven't
heard for some time and wonder where has it gone....i go back in past...and hear my giggles when i was young.....myclimb up the tall trees....bare foot in play grounds,my chase behind the butterflies......my hands soaked with  colours they left behind.......a bat on my shoulder,and play till the sun dived .....and the laughter is all i hear ......but why this lonely heart ,cant be filled up once again...why this emptiness.....the smallest of sound ,i wait for some one to knock at my door......i go back in my world of loneliness by my side ,when i hear the knock, at some one else's door......i searched the stars,when i came in to existence and came across the theory of dooms day when i was born.......don't try to convince me .....don't try to tell me...not to believe in stars.......just let it be,,let me write.....right or wrong .....my word are my friends who understand my emotions behind every word i write.....i am a fairy,at times a bird,some times i am in love with some one who does not exist.....i am grateful to the moment when God decided ,not to be miser and blessed me with expression through which I connect with  you all . its my words right or wrong , is all i have to share my thoughts.

copyright(c)alka narula
photo credit desibucket.com.

when you touched me

This is my first attempt to compose lyrics,please leave a comment good or bad,critics are most welcome.    

                              

                   

                      when you touched me and the sun was gone

                the lights were low and the breeze had just begun

                    i felt tingled  and  my heart  gave away in love

 when my sighs sounded like they were in deep pain ,in sweet pain that you  gave my heart and came too close to me that night .

                               when you touched me gently and kissed my face
                              
                                 i heard the music  play in my heart
                                 
 can never forget the sweet pain that i felt when all the heavenly bodies united  to testify, the sweetness that our love filled in the air

                              and often i lose myself in memories of that night

                                when the sun was gone and night had arrived

                                        when our love was on extreme high

                                   when i heard sound of arousal in my sighs

                                 all my chords played the music for you to hear

                                         that i am high on your love tonight

             and i let myself lose and tried not to hold  my feeling that night and believed in the music my heart   played, when all the heavenly bodies showered us with chants that they could feel the sweetness of love that filled  the air,  when you touched  my chords and they played the music for us that night when i was deep in love.


            copyright(c)alka narula
      photo credit groonk.net

                  

                             

when the sun shines

when the sun shines ,you are not there but i feel you in every breath that i take.....every morning i hear you whisper in my ear"i will be back when you sleep and the life will start all over once again"......and i wonder when would  life allow me to feel you when you are there.

every night you sleep with me with your arm around my waist....and i cant see you while you feel me when i sleep ....its  your whispers that tell me of past night how you felt.....and i wonder when would life allow me to feel you when you are there.

can i plead ,that i want to see you once again....a wonderful feeling i want to experience once again, its not easy to live with just the presence of you  that i feel , around me when the sun shines and every breath that i take....please allow me to feel you the way you feel me, when i sleep at night  once again .

i told you, that i love you more than you think ...please allow me to feel the warmth when you hold me tight and feel your breath fly a few of my hair around my nape...can you hear me,when the sun shines, i want to hear your sound once again ,i want you to look into my eyes and tell me ," you love more than i think once again "

 copy right (c)alka narula
photo credit mobileapples

how deep is your love

Some one touched me in the morning sun and whispered softly in my ear , " how deep is your love for me  " .....i smiled but before i could open my mouth to say ......   i saw him fade away  ....i touched my heart  while i gazed at the sun   .......all i could see was a kite behind the drapes and  could feel his presence in the air,that was freezing now in the hot summer sun ....... i closed my eyes  to hear once again,  "how deep is your love for me "

I looked at the summer sun and  thought it was my imagination , but the air was chilled and made it hard for me to breathe that made me sense ....he is around but not to be seen ....i picked up a fern  from the bunch of flowers ,dipped it deep in my heart.....and  wrote gently on the wall ,"my love is deeper than you think . either  prove you are around me ,my love or let me lurch in my deep thoughts; but don't you whisper again in my ear as it makes my heart to bleed in love, that  you can see  all over  on the walls"

The kite flew and sat on sat on my writings on the wall......in dismay i watched  it disappear, after erasing  my writings on the walls, that i write every morning when some one whispers softly in my ear.....suddenly the light  disappeared ,  leaving me grope in the deep dark...and i felt some one kiss my face and whisper softly in my ear " darling i am here with you every night and kiss you while you are  asleep ........ right now i will go to come back again , when you are in your dreams and are in your deep thoughts "

Ever since then it  has become a routine for me to wait for night to fall ,and  go back to sleep...though i cant see him but i know  every night he is there with me, when i sleep and whispers "i love you darling " in my ear before he  leaves ........ and i see a kite behind the drape till the morning goes to sleep and life begins all over again !!.

copy  right (c)alka narula
photo credit mobileapples

you changed my life in a moment

You changed my life in a moment when i was lonely and trying to escape from this pain .......life without you had no meaning  but was a vacuum in lonely heart ..... but every thing now has changed in  my life has , ever since  you have come...... and now the wait  doesn't seem too long !!

Since you have changed my life in a moment , now try to stay for rest of the life to come....but i wonder if you can recognise me, among robins i have flocked together with to celebrate my love !!

You changed my life  in a moment that was lonely and the heart was in pain , now when you have come to stay and your love is true as you  claim  ....i am sure you will recognise , the robin in love among the flock !!

copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit photobucket.com

"Oh My God "

Some one i heard break open my heart , i concealed my love that poured  like a stream ....but  didn't let him realise , i may look like a rock but the core is soft..... just like theobroma  , i concealed my love that blossomed like a flower ,but didn't let him realise , i may look like a shrub full of thorns..... but the core is soft just like a sloe !!

 I wondered and asked The God, why am i forced to keep my heart under cover all the time....and  got the answer from The God  " i dont want some one to steal  your heart and want to save you from getting in pain, you are my child , i dont want you to get hurt...this is a world of burglars  "

Some thing i feel , surely is wrong....why cant i trust a sole who tries to get close ... "Oh My God"  bless me with some wisdom , to analyse  who is real  and who is disingenuous and fill up my life with joys of trust and true love , is all that i want  from you  !!

copy right (c)alka narula
 photo credit desicomments.com

a cobra pearl

when i heard some one knock at the door , i turned to see who could it be .......a dry leaf i  saw that came flying inside , i picked up the leaf to see where it came from.....outside i could see nothing but
moving leaves in rythm with breeze, that i believe was blowing for some time now and the sun  had gone off to sleep .....all i  could see was a bright eye shining in the dark.....i closed the door and wondered who could it be but the sound of the knock didnt stop !!

astonished by the bright eye that i had seen,i looked at the leaf that i had left near my dressing gown.....closely when i looked at the leaf....i could see a message that was written for me that read "honey i am back in your town ,waiting outside under the maple treee ....dont close the door on me...it took me
long to reach but i was wanderig in greens and found the Cobra Pearl (NAAG MANI in hindi ) for us to make all our dreams come true.....please dont fear...its me !!

i rushed ouside and looked under the tree ....the Cobra Pearl turned and came towards me.....i held him with both my hands and made a wish and there we were.......  every night ,together we dance under the maple tree......away from eyes of this envious world ,who will never believe ......that my love is back ,though he doesnt look like us but he can feel the beat of my heart......and i can relate with him .....this is a new life that could be envy for all but i am happy that i found my love in the end !!

copy right (c)alka narula
photo credit photobucket

keep moving on

Every time i am stuck in a tide that i can not ride and feel lost in a whirlpool ....... i don't give up nor look for some one to pull me aside ..... i bounce back and  tell my life " you keep trying to drown me "O" my life , but you cant stop my long strides  , its high time you gave up as i am not the one who is ever going to give up and will keep moving on !!

My life has been nasty for some reason  i can not find , but will never give up  though i may not rise above the sky , the mountain peak that i could have reached long back ,had things gone right.......and was  not pulled back by the tide .....but will never  stop and just keep moving on !!

Few steps forward and few backwards , that's how i move  but  ensure my steps forward are more than the ones i take backward ..... like a tortoise i move on and am sure one day i will defeat the pace with my slow but steady strides when life will give up and stop stalking  me and except my victory  and i shall never look back but keep moving on !!

copy right (c)alkanarula
 photo credit atmospheric science data centre

halo (the final destination Part I)

can you stop playing games with your mind ,my heart .........when i am so close to my destination don't let me fall apart , as i  can see a halo now  !!

my life when you left had fallen apart,i tried not to fall but follow your path....   don't let me stop from reaching my destination my heart,as i can see a halo now !!

life without love is an empty vessel my heart  ,it makes sound so loud that you don't want to hear..surrounded by emptiness but a mask of happiness i wear ........so don't let me stop from reaching  my destination my heart, as i can see i am close to  halo now !!

as i am reaching close to halo my heart,i hear the cloud burst and can see shooting stars.....all waiting for me and can hear the welcome sound ....so don't let me stop , as i can see the light closing in now , so please  wait for me to reach the final destination and together we shall rest in peace ... all i can see is a halo now !!

copyright (c)alkanarula
photo credit myspace.com

so lost in love

i was so lost in love , was thinking about you .......  the aroma in air had intoxicated my mind , and it could  think only about you  my love .....

lost in sweet pain , couldn't think beyond you.....and  the aroma of love was powerful enough to have blown me out of my mind ......... in thoughts , in pain i was bathed in sweetness that  was all around me ,my love.....

i cruised in love with a  beautiful feeling ,was thinking only about you ,the blossom on trees added a new dimension to my love for you....    amused and in love ,i looked around  for you as the aroma i knew was
coming from you my love.....

like a fool i never realised ,besides the blossom there was  a moschidae(musk deer) too ,who  confessed to me ,  "he was searching for me and followed the aroma and found me " i smiled but never told him the musk he followed i followed it too to find him ,my love !!

copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit photobucket,com

a great tale(part II)

together when we wrote on the white walls....i couldn't restrain from falling in love...i searched your eyes and i knew i was right.... your tell tale eyes told me you are  indeed in love ...... together while we  wrote on the page,blank that was........ we  felt for each other and fell in deep  love....now the world knows , together we  made a great tale, for every one to remember ...... and truly we loved each other ,the death couldn't do us apart......now though we left the world but still are in each others arms.....still in love with each other,our love knows no bound.....but the world is not aware since we left for new life.....lets do it one day , go back together and  continue to write story of our love.....whenever its time to refresh and update....the tale that we wrote together on the white walls which were empty when you were not there.....but together we wrote a tale of our love.

copyright(c)alka narula
photo credit pixheaven.net

a great tale

life without you is like a blank page ..... a story untold and theres nothing to be shared ...let the world know that together we  make a great tale.....lets write something on the blank page.... lets get together and write the script on the walls.......on each wall that i stare , when you are not around......lets write a great tale on love that we shall feel when together we write on the blank walls....let the world know we did not share the tale of our  love as there was nothing to share so far....but a great story will follow when together, we start writing on the white walls .....and the great tale ,you will know when you turn page by page......and read about our love written on each page.... that we shall write when you come in to my life.......now don't delay no more,its already too late.....give me some respite from lonely this life...is all that i can say.



copyright(c)alka narula

in that state

My love,my heart was in pain ...when you touched me the first time and made the  moonlight ,  shy away with that smile on your face......i couldn't open my eyes to look at you , when i heard the wind make a sound as if it had seen us together in that state !!

My love , my heart was in deep pain  ....when you kissed my face all over and made the ocean rise, but go back to deep with the passion that was visible in your eyes....i couldn't open my  eyes to look at your face , when i heard the lightening strike make a sound as if it had seen us together in that state !!

While you were holding me so tight, the moon whispered something to the sky..... i heard the sky come to  a halt with startling that sound ...and told me to open my eyes and don't miss the romance  that i felt but was being shy to open my eyes..... instead , look straight in to your eyes ,and live the moment that does not come every night !!

copyright(c)alkanarula
photo credit exceele.monster.com

An open invitation for chorus

Recently i posted a duet composed by me and my fellow blogger thousif razza and was overwhelmed with the response that particular post received,so it struck me just now going through some wonderful comments why not we post a chorus this is an open invitation to all those who feel they have a knack for poetry or if they even want to make an attempt can join me in this chorus.I have given the head start in the post you can post your lines  along with your blog link in my mment box,this is how it works.for eg x gives a continuation to my lines in the comment box,then z gives continuation to the lines of x and so on and in the end i take all the lines given in the comment box make an entire post out of it along with the name of the person who has written those specefic lines and also please leave your blog link so that i can post that too:) the invitation is open till 16/01/2012.Look forward to your comments.

please believe me life has just begun and together we can make it a  heaven if we want..... the sun is smiling  and the moon light has a hidden message for us ,that we can read if we are together from now on.

journey in a barren land..

life i feel , i can never cheat you , but with you together i am sure to defeat my destiny...please stay close,.if you think you can be my anchor and don't let me down . I promise , you will have no regrets once you get to know , i have no greed to prolong my journey in this barren land !!

life, please have belief in me and embrace me if you can....i can defeat my destiny if you stay close and hold my hand...i promise you will never complain once you know my honest core , all i need  is you to fondle me when i am hurt and my heart bleeds in loneliness !!

life ,please have faith in me , i can change my destiny....i can  row my boat all alone, but  feel the need for some one who can rejuvenate me when i am low on  my strength.... i promise , you will be blessed for lives to come if you relieve this soul from the world of materials !!

you are the one and the only one ,who i believe can be my oar and help me sweep through and reach the horizon...alone , i know i will reach the shore but need you to cheer me ,if ever i go down on my knees.....i promise ,i will pay the price before i reach the horizon !!

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photo credit faith centre,cafe sozo

duet composed by alka and thousif raza

My fellow blogger thousif raza who has been one of my regular readers(biiiig smile) and whos posts i follow and read on a regular basis  suggested we write a poem together,i was thrilled with the idea because apart from his blog http://knowingthousif.blogspot.com/ his comments itself  on my poetry were so beautiful,meaningful and poetic that i knew what he will write will be beautiful so we came up with  the idea of composing a duet together and posting it so here it goes hope u all enjoy reading it:)

 Me - i could read between the lines , i knew you were talking about , love that i knew and was aware , though we never talked about our love......your words changed my life that was lonely till date , now i know the meaning of love , dont need to be told that life is nothing without love !!

Thousif-"It’s always you, it has always been you.. Even before I said u knew, I tried like a fool, trying to express but you always knew.

I knew it needn’t be said but what I felt in my heart I wanted you to feel it too. So I said in a way of exactly how I felt inside. The warmth, the lushness of it, the depth and the passion. I couldn’t say it as I felt but I couldn’t stop myself from doing so too.

Like you’ve always been, I knew u always would be for me, understanding me even when I couldn’t make sense of myself. Making me believe that I’m not the only one who’s madly in love…"

Me-my love ,now i feel  warm inside, my feelings you can read i dont need to be spelt  out..swept in love that i feel inside,no wonder you didn't fail to read my heart, that  i tried to conceal with my smile and the smile was enough for you, to feel the depth of my love and what went on in my mind..........my feelings no more i need to reveal.

Thousif-Its like a bond unsaid, its like a string that wound us together... tying us together in the most graceful of knots. A knot unseen only felt. A  attraction only felt by us two for ourselves. The feeling inside our heart was something physical, it wasn't just a feeling.. i felt it alive, breathing and i knew it was alive from you... because u r the one who helped breathe life into it... my love

Me-my sweet love , your words are few but an oasis of dew that has drowned me in sweet pain,you are the one i knew could have read the tears that i  concealed in my eyes ....you did not even let me speak, but stole the words from my mouth that wouldn't have poured out, had you not been able to read my heart . you are my love and my life and i shall breathe your name always as long as i am alive

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photo credit mobileapples

once again....

I close my eyes and feel the pain...i am sure this life i cant run away....i am over with my fight with destiny, over and over again.....but i  made up my mind i am here to stay....no matter how hard you try to blow me away....you feel my heart inside ,you will be shocked to see the rock....but don't blame me for becoming so hard.....you are the one who didn't realise.......that you cant break a heart any number of times ,you feel like.....my fight with the tide,made me strong not to fight but ride on top of the wave ....that tries to drown you down ,and you are left with no peace.....now, this is my style to live my life....and i left you with no choice but to compromise.....and deep in your heart ,you may have realised ....i am a difficult one , to tow away.....but its your fault,you only wrote my destiny the way you liked and i am your beloved...that's what i heard when i spoke to a lady who was spiritual and was right in her own way....i was told by her ,the ones who are close to your heart are made to feel the maximum of pain....no regrets no more...we shall see when we meet once again ,and you will write my destiny once again !!

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photo credit daydreamsaboutgod.wordpress.com

jungle of souls....

At times i am cynical and a fool but who cares....that's how i was made,my chemistry is difficult for me to understand so don't blame ,just bear me now and believe in my words i am sane.....
At times i feel starved for love but that's the need for all....though we may try to conceal a lot in our hearts,
but i chose the silence to speak for me ....
Though i don't wish to speak out my heart but it comes out when i am in my thoughts,words just flow and  pours out , i don't know how and cant put it in words.....
Life for me is feelings that i feel in my heart....tender i was made by" the god" now i try to hide behind the mask....and was dropped in this jungle of souls , i was no one to decide....a puppet we all are, and played with strings which we don't hold and are controlled by a strong force !!
  is all i can say........
copyright(c)alka narula
photo credits en.wikipedia.org

phoenix (dedicated to Phoenix)

these lines dedicated to Phoenix( http://rphoenixaltar.blogspot.com/ ) ,a fellow blogger and inspired by his words in my comment box 

a myth that we all believe in ,about the  bird(phoenix) who burns itself in fire and is born again from the ashes it leaves behind but the one i know is  real ,  not a self destructive but rising one ,who read my pain !!.

he came around and advised me,temporary is the silence and i should do the learning and not think of the pain,i know he is right but i cant close my eyes to the hurt i face!!

the sound of Phoenix in the silence did bring, some comfort from pain ... i feel relieved now and much lighter to know there are people who may not know you but can relate with your words !!

a strange world of people , the ones you feel are going to be by your side are not around but you do find some one to relieve you from the agony, who they are you are not aware !!

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photo credit wikipedia

why this silence around

life in my bedroom with sound of  silence around ...... i look at the walls and widen my eyes...... to read the inscriptions not visible to eyes.......where to go , i wonder is this the way to go on...... i think of the wrong decisions i made in life.......and i wonder was that me or was it the life that made me choose ....what was not right and went wrong.....the doors are closed.......my knocks go  unheard, no one by my side... rest of my life how will i survive....no one i met who could steal my heart.......no one i feel is search of love and is around for some reason unknown....strange is life ...at times i feel i should close my eyes..... as there is no soul .....who is honest and true .....i dont believe ,it can happen this life..... but who knows theres another life to come .....or was there one in the past.....we pay the price for wrong deeds we have done.....but where as i know i was cautious all my life not hurt a soul .....nor play with no ones heart....but then why this silence around .....

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photo credit vi.sualise.us